With all the responsibilities we have on a daily basis some days we are lucky to get the kids their supper, baths and homework finished let alone find extra time to play or spend individual time with them. How do we find this extra time when there already isn't enough hours in our busy days? The answer is simple. We must be intentional about finding the time. We find time to check our Facebook and Twitter accounts numerous times a day but when our children ask us to read a book do we find that we "don't have the time"? Our priorities can become clouded without us realizing it. We need to ask God to show us where we can find extra time to devote to our children. Carving out extra time doesn't have to mean hours of planned play time. It's all the little moments that add up and matter to our children more than we know. Making time to have fun together as a family is an important part of being intentional in parenting and developing a closer family unit. And it's not something that takes a lot of effort or money on our part. Remember, it's not about WHAT we do it's the simple fact that we are doing something and our undivided attention is on them. Here are a few things that we do to have intentional time with our kids.
**Play games. I've mentioned in a few posts that our family enjoys games. we have a few members of our family that are quite competitive so this makes for an interesting time. It always involves lots of laughing (and on one occasion, Hannah taping Casey's mouth shut with duct tape lol...that's another story). When we play a game that is a little too hard for the younger kids we pair up or alter the rules a bit. We all enjoy game nights and what I love now that my older two are teenagers is that we don't have to force them to spend time with the family. Case might be in the middle of playing Xbox online with his friends but when we announce we are playing a game he puts his friends on hold and comes to the living room truly excited to play a board game with his family. He doesn't sulk or have to be made to spend time with us, he genuinely wants to spend time with his family and I believe it stems from years of us making time for family fun.
**Spend individual time with each child. I can't stress enough how important this is. Each child needs individual time with each parent on a regular basis. Giving undivided, one on one attention to each child is so critical as they grow up. Especially in families that have more than a few children, they need to feel like they are being heard and that they are not only an important part of the family unit but they are special individually. We've done this several different ways. Sometimes it is as simple as the kids taking turns going to the grocery with me while the others stay at home with daddy, getting to run an errand with daddy or going fishing on their birthday with daddy alone. These are times that they can feel like they don't have to compete for attention and occasionally they use it as a time to talk to us about something they are having a problem with (which is becoming more important now that there are teens in the house). We get to know our children individually during these times and have found that it's even more important as we are entering the teen years to keep this connection with them.
Picnics, hikes, taking a Sunday afternoon drive, even watching a movie together with popcorn, there are so many ways to enjoy time together as a family. Time given to our children will never be time wasted and spending time with them sends a very clear message that they are important enough to spend our precious, limited time on. It's an investment in the future that will result in a greater return than we could achieve any other way. The old adage rings true "no one ever gets to the end of their life and says they wish they would've spent less time with their children"
"Time is free but it is priceless. You can't own it but you can use it. You can't keep it but you can spend it. Once it's gone you can't get it back." ~Harvey McKay